I'm Going to Start Carrying Around a Giant Cut off the Head Sword, and Hire a...

[tinselwolverine]

...videographer to come with me, as I move about on my business throughout Los Angeles.

And if the police ever stop me, and ask me "why are you carrying that cutting off the head sword?" I'm gonna answer...in case any ISIL come up to me and say "get on your knees; we're gonna cut off your head and videotape it" I'm gonna answer "you faggot towel head bitch ass mother fucker...this is MY HOOD! So you get your bitch ISIL ass down on your own motherfuckin' knees, cuz I'm gonna have my videographer tape me cutting off YOUR motherfuckin' head..."

 

[Monster]

...videographer to come with me, as I move about on my business throughout Los Angeles.

And if the police ever stop me, and ask me "why are you carrying that cutting off the head sword?" I'm gonna answer...in case any ISIL come up to me and say "get on your knees; we're gonna cut off your head and videotape it" I'm gonna answer "you faggot towel head bitch ass mother fucker...this is MY HOOD! So you get your bitch ISIL ass down on your own motherfuckin' knees, cuz I'm gonna have my videographer tape me cutting off YOUR motherfuckin' head..."

I have a better idea...

 

[tinselwolverine]

I have a better idea...

Works for me...

 

[Gulo Blue]

I have quoted Mark Twain's Defense of General Funston a number of times on this message board regarding the uselessness of torture because his comments about the use of 'the water cure' by American soldiers parallels more recent statements about waterboarding. When General Funston died (of a heart attack) his post was filled by Pershing.

No political statement there, just an FYI. Small world. 100-year old references by 2 different posters are somewhat linked.

 

[byco42]

There's a Gen. Pershing street in my town. Now I know why.

 

[Michchamp]

I have a better idea...

Hold on. Snopes has said this is unconfirmed.

You forgot one of the rules of the internet: when some idiot Republican shows up and starts sharing links & talking tough about something related to war, Muslims, 9/11, Vietnam, etc., run it by the experts first. It probably never happened. Even things everyone is completely sure of and seem self-evidently true... it always comes out they never happened (after we go to war or bomb someone of course).

 

[Monster]

Didn't say it was true, but from what I've read, this did happen. There seems to be debate about parts of the story, though.

The point was that I think it's a funny story. That's all. The fuckers want paradise and are willing to die for it, but are killed by devilish pork which basically nullifies any good they did for Allah.

 

[TheVictors]

whether it happened or not, it's a bit of a causual leap to assume the witness testimony of one "extremist" who was allowed to live and tell the tale resulted in "forty-two years" with no attacks..

 

[Michchamp]

Didn't say it was true, but from what I've read, this did happen. There seems to be debate about parts of the story, though.

The point was that I think it's a funny story. That's all. The fuckers want paradise and are willing to die for it, but are killed by devilish pork which basically nullifies any good they did for Allah.

It's funny cause it's true?

 

[tinselwolverine]

It's funny cause it's true?

It's funny because it's more stupid religious shit.

 

[Monster]

It's funny cause it's true?

It's a funny story because their religion was used against them. Doesn't matter if the story is true. Live as an idiot, die as an idiot. And it wasn't a serious suggestion, just like the OP wasn't a serious suggestion.

 

[Michchamp]

It's a funny story because their religion was used against them. Doesn't matter if the story is true. Live as an idiot, die as an idiot. And it wasn't a serious suggestion, just like the OP wasn't a serious suggestion.

eh. Yeah, it would be sort of funny if it actually happened, I guess. religion sucks.

 

[tinselwolverine]

It's a funny story because their religion was used against them. Doesn't matter if the story is true. Live as an idiot, die as an idiot. And it wasn't a serious suggestion, just like the OP wasn't a serious suggestion.

Believe, I got my head on a swivel for them ISIL sons of bitches coming here to Los Angeles.

Byco says they're walking right across the Mexican border into California; LA is one of the first places they're going to get to.

And they'll be in the Sacramento area before you know it after that.

I would advise you to get you one of them head cuttin' off swords yourself.

 

[Monster]

Believe, I got my head on a swivel for them ISIL sons of bitches coming here to Los Angeles.

Byco says they're walking right across the Mexican border into California; LA is one of the first places they're going to get to.

And they'll be in the Sacramento area before you know it after that.

I would advise you to get you one of them head cuttin' off swords yourself.

I have a Louisville Slugger. I prefer mashed terrorist to headless terrorist. The shock value of that video...yes.

 

[Michchamp]

You know... you can carry a gun much more easily (and less conspicuously), and guns are more effective weapons than swords.

I'd also suggest you speak to an attorney before carrying a sword around (or a gun for that matter), as most jurisdictions have criminal penalties for publicly carrying a bladed weapon over a few inches in length.

 

[tinselwolverine]

I have a Louisville Slugger. I prefer mashed terrorist to headless terrorist. The shock value of that video...yes.

That will work too. In fact the bat provides are uniquely American twist.

 

[tinselwolverine]

You know... you can carry a gun much more easily (and less conspicuously), and guns are more effective weapons than swords.

I'd also suggest you speak to an attorney before carrying a sword around (or a gun for that matter), as most jurisdictions have criminal penalties for publicly carrying a bladed weapon over a few inches in length.

I'm going to say it's justifiable on account of the pending ISIL emergency.

 

[zyxt9]

Just make sure the ISIL guys see you coat the sword in pig blood before cutting off their heads.

 

[Sbee]

It's a funny story because their religion was used against them. Doesn't matter if the story is true. Live as an idiot, die as an idiot. And it wasn't a serious suggestion, just like the OP wasn't a serious suggestion.

that has to be a hit on the Republican email forwarding circuit

 

[Gulo Blue]

You could invest in one of these: