OT: Xmas Dilemma

[TheVictors]

We have a bit of a Holiday dilemma on our hands this year with the kiddo and his "Wish List" and more specifically, what he has asked Santa Claus for this year.

My awesome, supercool little dude has asked for an iPad Mini ...and there is no way I think it is appropriate (or reasonable) to give a 7yr old such a gift.

But ...as any fellow parent knows, there is an inherent, internal conflict when it comes to our kids and wanting to provide for them/see them happy and make "dreams come true."

In this situation, if Santa Claus were to disappoint, I'd feel bad because he's at the age where kids start to hear things from the older kids about Santa ...and he is a very "Good" boy.

When I was his age, I desperately wanted that Mattel Football game

but didn't get it ...my parents wouldn't have been able to afford it. I remember being crushed and very upset when all the presents had been opened and I didn't get it. A year or two later all I wanted was a Walter Payton jersey and instead I got some ROSS Bears t-shirt ...but didn't realize at the time just how poor we were.

We are incredibly fortunate, lucky (or "blessed") to be able to provide many nice things for our son, but there is no way he's getting an iPad from us or Santa and I don't know what to do.

Nothing? Just tell him, "well maybe next year" ....?
Have Santa write him a letter explaining iPads are for older kids ....?

What??

To this point, in past years, he's asked for a Michigan Hockey jersey ...an Optimus Prime action figure and other reasonable toys but an iPad is just too much.

My objective Dad side says he'll get over it and no way but I don't want to crush his Christmas spirit either.

Anyone of you seasoned Dads got advice for this one?

[apologies in advance for posting this here]

 

[Monster]

Kindle Fire HDX

U can regulate the kids time on it and set strict parental restrictions. Ipad is too expensive for any 7 year old. Kindle runs Android and is much simpler for the little guy. My suggestion - get it for him as a gift from his parents. He'll love u just a tad more for it haha!

 

[Monster]

If you're on the fence go to youtube and find reviews for the tablets. Better to be informed.

 

[Sbee]

Some aspects if parenting are tougher when you have resources. I remember there was a GI Joe aircraft carrier that was something like $150, I wouldn't have imagined asking my parents for that, it seemed like an astronomical amount of money at the time. I also grew up in a blue collar area and nobody was well off.

The conversation gets tougher when you have to say "I won't" vs "I can't." You can't really explain it well under the guise of santa though.

I'd say go with your gut feeling and get him more appropriate toys, that's more in line with the values you want to instill

 

[Michchamp]

How much is an ipad mini?

I've actually heard about other parents having problems with this specific issue. one attorney I know bought two ipads and called them "for the family" so no one kid in her family thought it was theirs.

 

[lostleader]

A iPad mini looks to be around $300 bucks. I am sure you can find a tablet that is more kid friendly for less if that's the route you want to go.

I can think of lots of times as a kid I didn't get what I wanted or asked for. That's life my boys will get to experience it. I can remember when I was around 7 my parents wrapped up rocks and gave them to me for Christmas. It was the only present for me under the tree at the time. Dad had moved the rest. Very cruel, but was funny when it was my brother.

I'm sure you little one asked for more than a ipad, so even with out that he will be happy and the IPad will be a an after thought. It's not like it's a red rider bb gun. Plus who wants an apple with a bite taken out of it?

 

[sggatecl]

I like the idea of a family tablet. We have a Samsung Note that my son monkeys with some times but we have rules about using it at certain times of the day and lengths of time. Mom and Dad have priority as well and he seems to be cool with it.

 

[zyxt9]

Vic, you are somewhat looking at this from an old foggie perspective, no offense.

It is not the tablet that is the problem, it is what parents allow their kids to do on it.

Best thing I ever bought my son when he was still 22 MONTHS old was an Acer tablet. It is shocking how quickly he learned how to use it. Why did I buy it for him? Honestly, we were about to go on a long road trip from New York to Florida. Installed all of his favorite home videos shot from our smart phones along with recordings from various disney shows, especially Sharkie and Bones music videos, plus all kinds if music Apps like drums, piano, xylaphone, and educational puzzles and other games. It is amazing how he navigates through all of these, though at times he needs some help.

Point being, kids your sons age will be behind technology wise if they are not given these things. As long as you control what gets installed, it can be an amazing tool for your son in his development through his understanding of technology and the educational apps,coupled with some fun things fir a good balance. You can even limit the amount of time per day he can "play" on it.

I figured if tablets are being used to help communicate with autistic kids, then a 2 year old who is thankfully fairly smart can use it and it in turn can teach him things. On any road trip over an hour it has been a blessing to have it instead of grabbing dozens of toys to keep him occupied, but he is also now tech savvy and will have that advantage going forward. If your son doesn't have a tablet soon, he will start falling behind on the tech curve. There are 10 year old hackers these days for crying out loud. Better he have as much tech in his life as possible so in the future he won't struggle in any way with it and instead it is just part of his everyday life. I'm sure he already p,ays on the computer, so in the end, how much different is it for him having his own portable computer? The mey, as with anything, is remaining a responsible parent and monitoring what he does with it.

 

[Gulo Blue]

How much is an ipad mini?

I've actually heard about other parents having problems with this specific issue. one attorney I know bought two ipads and called them "for the family" so no one kid in her family thought it was theirs.

I like this idea. It doesn't solve your Christmas problem, but it allows you to keep an eye on the device without as much of a perceived snooping issue.

I agree with with zyxt regarding getting some kind of tablet for kids these days, but it's an easier choice when you're talking about 3 years olds and Leapfrog tablets. (I'm not sure about full blown tablets or anything that's social media capable.) There's got to be some online resource with advice for a 7 year old.

 

[Michchamp]

I like this idea. It doesn't solve your Christmas problem, but it allows you to keep an eye on the device without as much of a perceived snooping issue.

I agree with with zyxt regarding getting some kind of tablet for kids these days, but it's an easier choice when you're talking about 3 years olds and Leapfrog tablets. (I'm not sure about full blown tablets or anything that's social media capable.) There's got to be some online resource with advice for a 7 year old.

dude there is MORE than enough parenting advice online. the problem is not whether there is advice, but sifting through the quantity of parenting advice posted by complete morons, or anyone associated with Oprah Winfrey.

 

[Michchamp]

side notes:

- I think you also have to consider what your kid's peers are doing/getting. While it's no reason to spoil a kid, I think growing up without the things the kids around him have does do some psychological damage. look at how kenny gets treated on south park.

- I wish I could get away with telling my kid there is no Santa Claus. the sooner he learns not to believe in stupid fairy tales, the better off he'll be. But teh wife is not in agreement with that, and I do concede given the peer pressures kids face, it's shitty for parents to do anything that makes their kid stand out from the herd.

 

[jever4321]

After the second generation iPads came out my wife and I were able to pick up the first generation iPad for a nice discount. There are a lot of educational things a 7 year old can do on it. Yes it's not the latest and greatest but the kids don't know any better. In my opinion, he's a really good kid, he can learn a lot from it you'll be glad you did. It's also a really nice distraction on road trips or if you and mrs. Vic need some alone time. ;-)

Just don't let him play with it 24/7...

Also definitely have Santa make it a family gift.

 

[jever4321]

Oh and don't feel guilty because you can afford to give your son an expensive gift. That doesn't automatically make them spoiled. My kids have way more things than I ever had growing up. I'm proud of that... But I feel like I'm raising good kids. They have great manners because my wife and I are sticklers about that kind of thing. We also spend a lot of time with them and make sure electronics don't take over our job to raise them. I look at the iPad as a tool more than a toy. They learn things and I think it helps open their mind. Now if they mis-behave that's a luxury that can be removed from them quickly and they really respond...

 

[Michchamp]

Oh and don't feel guilty because you can afford to give your son an expensive gift. That doesn't automatically make them spoiled. My kids have way more things than I ever had growing up. I'm proud of that... But I feel like I'm raising good kids. They have great manners because my wife and I are sticklers about that kind of thing. We also spend a lot of time with them and make sure electronics don't take over our job to raise them. I look at the iPad as a tool more than a toy. They learn things and I think it helps open their mind. Now if they mis-behave that's a luxury that can be removed from them quickly and they really respond...

if my kid misbehaves, I ain't just takin' away no ipad... I'm gettin' out the whippin' stick.

 

[TheVictors]

Thanks guys, I knew there would be some solid advice and yeah, Jever ...I am proud to be able to provide things my parents never could have when I was a kid. Hell, at one point, we had "Mexican Pizza Night" for dinner -- turns out it was quesadillas, or a dinner that cost about $1 because that's all we could do.

As for the iPad/Tablet thing -- that's part of the problem. Both my wife and I have iPads, so he's played on both of ours and has to ask permission. But, some of our friends seem to let their kids play on their iPads all the time and I get the impression my little guy thinks these kids have their own.

And he already, pre-emptively, said he does not want a Kindle Fire because it doesn't do the same things or have the same apps (the Mrs. and I just looked at one another as he explained why...).

And it is amazing how kids seem as if they were born with tablets in their hands ...you should see my son try to mess with my archaic blackberry and touch the screen, trying to enlarge pictures, etc. Even in 1st grade at his school the kids use tablets to work out problems and answer teacher questions, so the application of the technology and the idea that he's being exposed to something that will benefit him later is there.

I'm starting to think that maybe Mom and I will look at older iPads or a Kindle and tell Santa to get him something else (Legos), so that we can give him almost what he's asking for, let Santa get him something he asked Santa for and things will work out.

 

[Gulo Blue]

if my kid misbehaves, I ain't just takin' away no ipad... I'm gettin' out the whippin' stick.

Just make sure you follow The rule of thumb (which I've read is a myth and wasn't actually the rule anywhere.)

 

[thewolverines24]

And it is amazing how kids seem as if they were born with tablets in their hands ...you should see my son try to mess with my archaic blackberry and touch the screen, trying to enlarge pictures, etc

One of my favorite things about this is seeing kids just try to slide their finger across the front of a book or magazine to open it.

 

[Gulo Blue]

One of my favorite things about this is seeing kids just try to slide their finger across the front of a book or magazine to open it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aXV-yaFmQNk

 

[Michchamp]

we're making our kids stupid. really, really stupid.

but I guess this has been building for a while, and is just reaching critical mass now that even babies use graphical interfaces... I remember being handicapped by a lack of technology (or more accurately, different technology) in high school. I had an HP48 graphing calculator instead of a TI-85. totally different programming & logic

 

[Gulo Blue]

we're making our kids stupid. really, really stupid.

but I guess this has been building for a while, and is just reaching critical mass now that even babies use graphical interfaces... I remember being handicapped by a lack of technology (or more accurately, different technology) in high school. I had an HP48 graphing calculator instead of a TI-85. totally different programming & logic

I still use my TI-85. Almost everyday. Used it already today. Discontinued in '97. Hope it never dies.

It has this sticker on the back:

Wolframalpha.com can probably do everything it can do. It can do tons of things the TI-85 can't.