Detroit Tigers Team Notes
KC Appreciation Tread with thanks to WingedWheel.
http://boards.espn.go.com/boards/mb/mb?sport=mlb&id=det&tid=7325333&tsn=1
A troll-wannabe saw his intended thread wasn't going as planned and deleted it hoping to at least spoil our fun. Sadly for him, I have a decent memory.
Let's restart a thread to honor our Great Poster, KalineCountry. Posters are welcome to contribute their thanks and their Chuck Norris / Most Interesting Man in the World type jokes (unless KalineCountry starts to get annoyed by them).
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KC once struck out Babe Ruth...................on two pitches.*
KC once started an awkward thread just to see how it felt.^
If KC called you a troll, you'd have to resist the strong urge to thank him.^
KC has been the subject of threads he never created.
When KC goes to Fenway park, they temporarily rename the Green Monster the KC Monster.
When KC posts, everyone else looks like a troll.
KC doesn't spit out sunflower seeds. He spits out Redwood trees.
Leyland can often be seen referring to Detroit Tiger's Team Notes during a game.
Area 51 is known as KC's backyard.
When KC posts, ESPN tunes in.
The Bible says that Jesus walked on water. What the Bible did not record was that He did so in order to talk to KC about the Tiger's starting lineup.
Chuck Norris and KC once had an arm-wrestling contest. Before you worry about him, it turned out OK...Chuck made a full recovery.
The seventh inning stretch originated when President William Howard Taft rose from his seat to greet KC and to shake his hand for curing Polio.
Dr Rahmani trusts his eyes to KC.
KC could tell when a Coors Light was cold before the invention of the blue sticker thingy.
KC once bunted for an inside-the-park grand slam.
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* belongs to a poster I cannot remember.
^ belongs to zulander
Sam Bernstein calls KC.
KC once made a leaping grab up against the Berlin Wall, ending the Cold War immediately.
Back in 1982, KC argued balls and strikes with an umpire and the umpire threw himself out of the game.
I was wondering where that thread went. The post with the asterik was mine.
Al Kaline's favorite jersey is a KC jersey.
KC once hit a groundball just to see how it felt to RUN to first.
(1) When Cabrera hits a ball down the line, KC telepathically rotates the stadium to keep the ball fair. He does the opposite for Youkilis
(2) KC's house doesn't have doors, only walls which he walks through.
(3) KC sneezes with his eyes open.
(4) KC has all MLB and MILB and amatuer baseball stats stored in his brain. All internet sites actually redirect your stat inquires to KC's brain.
(5) Google asks KC for information.
KC can sing "Take me out to the ballgame" in 140 different languages...including Ancient Sanskrit.
Drugs get hooked on KC.
Ty Cobb never tried to take out KC at second base.
They tried to make a KC action figure, but kids were getting hurt in the testing phase.
KC once hit a ball off the Tower of Pisa...from Wrigley Field.
Humble pie simply looks egotistical when placed next to KC.
Anna Kournikova wanted to attend one of KC's parties, but was denied entrance for not being hot enough.
KC doesn't have to do anything to get a Klondike bar.
K.C. knows Victoria's secret
K.C. Irons his trousers while there still on.
K.C. is suing NBC, claiming Law and order are trademarked names for his left and right fist.
K.C. once ran around the world in 10 minutes,he spent 9 minutes stretching
Allstate gets it's insurance from K.C. because even Allstate needs to be in good hands.
K.C. can start a fire by rubbing 2 ice cubes together.
K.C. Is cooler than the underside of a pillow.
When KC started walking to the corn in "Field of Dreams" he went invisible five feet beyond second base. As the saying goes, he is in a league of his own.
The waves were 30 feet a terrified pro surfer asked KC if he was going out. KC sez "no son i dont go out till it gets big".
Rosin bags use KC to stay dry.
KC doesn't use chewing tobacco. He uses chewing tabasco.
One time when he was pitching, KC threw a batter some chin music. The man later told reporters that he had heard an entire 4-movement symphony and the encore piece.
Darren McCarty beat Claude Lemieux after taking lessons from KC
KC is the most interesting man in the world...stay thirsty my friends.
KC once turned water into gatorade.
Hanging on KC's fence is a sign that reads "Beware of Tiger."
The only one allowed to mess up Dombrowski's hair is KC.
Baseball fans know the K as the symbol for strikeout. Baseball purists know it's actually short for KC.
Ball Park franks explode when KC cooks 'em.
KC brought an ant back to life by giving it mouth-to-mouth.
Several years ago, an entire country was lifted out of bankruptcy when KC accidentally left his wallet behind.
KC doesn't break wind...he breaks the sound barrier.
KC doesn't need to shake the ketchup bottle before putting it on his hotdog.
The only man on the planet that knows the one word that rhymes with "Orange" is KC.
After he steals a base, KC always makes sure to give it back when he's done with it.
When KC worked his mail route dogs had to carry pepper spray...
The beetles were once asked how often they'd like to see KC post. The result was their hit "Eight Days A Week."
KC once visited this thread and laughed, not because it was funny, but because he thought it humorous that some people thought his greatness could be described.
The pope pays his vatican city rent to KC.
Even atheists believe in KC.
Bob Gibson admits that the inside of the plate belongs to KC.
KC once played second base and turned an unassisted triple play by force out at third, second and first.
I'm not as witty as some of you but I will say I enjoy reading KCs post and the Tigers board and all of ESPN are that much better because of KC. Thank you.
When a woman asks KC if the dress she is wearing makes her look fat, he can get away with telling the truth.
If he gets within 100 miles of a compass, it points due KC.
When he catches behind the plate, he doesn't wear a glove.
You know the "previous" or "return" button on your remote control that comes in so handy with annoying commercials? KC invented it.
KC's enemies list him as an emergency contact
Michael Jordan shows KC his underwear
When KC looks at a mirror, his reflection flashes him a thumbs up
"He is the life of parties he has never attended"
"If he were to punch you in the face, you'd have to fight off the urge to thank him."
Alien abductors have asked him, to probe them.
K.C has won the lifetime achievement award...twice
Chuck Norris wears KC pajamas to bed.
The sun has to put on a special lotion to protect itself from KC rays.
KC has never had a netflix ad pop up on his computer.
There's no such thing as the moon. Only a home run ball that KC hit many years ago.
KC knows who shot JFK.
KC once farted.... 26 states lost power to the grid.
KC doesn't do push ups - he pushes the earth down.
KC once bunted for a ground rule double.
KC threw a 28 out perfect game.
That's all I've got, I'm not very good at this.
Seriously Ron, udaman. We are all lucky to have you on this board.
The International Space Station was actually built to be KC's summer home.
Unlike the Incredible Hulk, you'd like KC even if he were angry.
KC once lent Roy Hobbs his bat, and the f------g jerk broke it.
During a televised game:
When KC talks to the screen the electronics reverse and the players, umps and managers actually hear Ron. If they listen... they do just fine. The Red Sox have been listening more this year (of course KC is telling them to lose), and the missed call in the perfect game was only because KC was on the phone in the kitchen telling the Joint Chiefs how to finish up the war in Iraq. A patriot first this guy.
KC calls Pete Rose "lazy"
KC prints faster than most copiers.
KC doesn't use the bathroom - he tells his body to recycle everything.
KC won the MLB and NHL MVP's in the same year by hitting 112 HR's ... with a hockey stick.
KC won the World Series Of Poker by beating a royal straight flush with a 5 high..
Deja Vu experiences KC.
KC never walks or runs to first base. He hops in his Mercedes Benz and drives there.
Whenever KC digs in at the plate, a hole opens up somewhere in China.
Trolls spellcheck before they post on KC's threads.
When he was in school, KC's teachers took notes about what he said.
KC doesn't get wet. Water gets KC'd.
KC is always two steps ahead of you, but still watches your back.
When KC visits DC - the President waits in traffic.
When asked why KC would only hit .390 in today's baseball -
Gammons replied - well, he's 70.
Every morning before he jumps out of bed, KC sings the National Anthem.
When KC opens a bag of crackerjacks, the peanuts are always at the top.
KC can remember back to the time when the Roman Colosseum was called "Old Tiger's Stadium."
KC mows his 5 acre yard with nose clippers in 10 seconds...
Pete Townsend smashed his first guitar b/c he could never be as cool as KC.
Why Ron (KC) is so cool:
When the Titanic struck the iceberg.............out popped a mammoth, trapped for centuries in that ice.
Did I say a mammoth poster? Oh, well, anyway that is why he is so coooool.
He is an old fart ya know. Titanic went down same year Tiger Stadium went up. Yep, he had to be there at the iceberg gathering peices of wood....and upon returning to Motown he used the decking to TA-DA., create the old green wood seats at Michigan and Trumble.
That's what he told me...and you cant prove us wrong cause the Corner is gone. Watch out though...KC might leave Bahston on a single day trip and rebuild the thing.
The Bermuda Triangle avoids KC.
KC once pinch-hit...for himself.
The Tigers acquired Miguel Cabrera in a trade. What you didn't know was that Florida got a KC-autographed bubble-gum wrapper in return.
KC can believe it's not butter.
Lochness monsters possess a blurry photograph of KC.
When KC is batting and asks for time, the umpire gives KC the current times in London, New York, Moscow and Beijing.
http://geekofriendly.files.wordpress.com/2008/10/south-park-wow-01.jpg
Now this picture, except for a bit more hair on top of my head, is what I probably look like most mornings doing the Tigers team notes with my coffee and cigar.
just wanted to acknowledge all the recent postings. thanks to everyone,
all of these "legend of kc" comments are too funny!!
He once donated his own heart to save a young child's life. KC told the doctors, "Don't worry about me - I'll grow another one."
When KC fields the last out of an inning and throws the ball to the fans, the ball miraculously has his autograph on it.
Michael Jordan wears Air KCs.
The US ban on Cuban imports was just to ensure KC would always have enough cigars.
Cotton candy is 10% sugar, 90% KC.
KC uses barbed wire to floss his teeth.
When KC throws his slider, three mini-burgers appear on top of home plate.
KC would have saved the earth in Armageddon..... without dying.
KC chops wood with his hands.......tyed behind his back.
"Batman" was based on the life of KC - as has every other movie.
He's so patriotic that if you were to stand Jack Bauer next to KC, Jack would look like a Soviet commie.
When KC clicks "Report Violation" on your post, you are instantly vaporized.
The secret ingredient in Baseball Rubbing Mud is KC's sweat.
LMFAO!!! Kenny Rogers recently admitted to taking a blood tranfusion from KC before the 2006 postseason.
Five minutes into the filming of a "Barney & Friends" episode, KC strode out onto the stage to greet the admiring cameras and the joyful children. Stopping just short of the lovable, singing purple dinosaur, KC rolled up his sleeves and decked Barney to the floor. The station decided later not to air the episode for fear of it being, "Too educational."
Medusa looked into KC's eyes and was turned to stone.
KC can intercept a fastball, skate down the football field, bang it off the sky and finish by slam dunking it for 7 points.
When Captain Kirk calls for "shields up," KC hops on top of the USS Enterprise and wags his finger.
KC has to unclick the bold icon before typing.
"Lord of the Rings" wouldn't have lasted twelve hours had Frodo just given the damn ring to KC.
KC has been on the far side of the moon. He says it looks alot like the other side of the moon, only alot darker.
KC uses the memory button on the calculator.
KC's swimming ability drove Michael Phelps to do drugs.
Before he gives you a knuckle-sandwich, KC asks if you'd like him to hold the mayo.
When KC throws his screwball, women in the stands lose their virginity.
KC is the first man to land on the sun..
Jose Valverde is tipping his cap to KC.
KC's sucker pitch leaves the batter tasting green apple.
Elvis Presley once said, "Look, there goes KC!"
KC can lay down a perfect bundt cake.
KC is the Sunshine Band..
KC ordered French dressing on his salad; it came covered in berets.
Hummingbirds drink the nectar from KC's ear wax.
Vampires make the sign of the cross to keep KC away.
KC fixes cars by giving them a stern look.
The Red Sox curse of the Bambino actually had faded into oblivion 20 years ago. It was immediately replaced by a stronger curse......The Curse of the Ron-nino, or as we call him "The KC Kid".
The KC Kid was asked to help Drew Barrymore with her lines in the baseball-romantic comedy "Fever Pitch". They hit it off so well he decided to lift the curse just so Drew's movie would have a better ending. The folowing BoSox WS win was just the aftershock of Ron-nino's giving in.
If KC were to throw a grass blade at you, you'd die.
The only time KC takes a bath is during a meteor shower.
Before KC uses "Just for Men Hair Gel" he laughs and peels off the letter "n".
Every time KC flushes the toilet, an angel gets its wings.
KC never strikes in the same place twice. Just kidding. He does.
My fiance screams Kaline's name every night, but half the time
he's not even there.
In a World Series game in '68, KC waved himself home.
KC can give someone the finger...with his middle toe.
Once when fans were doing the wave, KC came out of nowhere with his surfing board and rode around the stadium fifteen times.
KC prefers to get loose in the alligator pen.
A tornado is actually just KC in his windup.
KC's fantasy baseball team consists of the last two year's worth of Playboy Playmates.
Outfielders lose the ball in the light emitted by KC's smile.
KC has recorded one out for every atom in the universe.
KC has hit a single...with cheese.
Alkaline batteries power KC.
Batman is KC's batboy.
KC had four World Series rings reworked to form a set of brass knuckles.
By his mere presence, KC can straighten out both curly fries and Rosie O'Donnell.
KC has eaten a tootsie roll that was only 30 years old.
Google doesn't store KC's personal data.
Scientists have postulated that the big bang of the "Big Bang Theory" was KC hitting his first home run. Consequently, he has the universe in one of those square plastic baseball cases on his shelf at home.
You may have heard of Beethoven's "F
